June 2016
Hello Family, Friends, Benefactors, and all those in
between…
Could a
year living with the Apostles of the Interior Life already be over? It seems
only a short time ago that I was moving my stuff a couple blocks down the road
out of my college apartment into the “convent” that is really just a
ranch-style house with a chapel in it. But yet here we are, a year later and a
month from moving to Rome! For those who don’t know, my stay in Rome will be at
least 5 years since in October I will enroll and begin studying at the
Pontifical University of St. John in Lateran. I will study 2 years of
Philosophy and 3 years of Theology in pursuit of a bachelor’s degree in
Theology. This, along with prayer, community life, and apostolate, will
comprise my years of formation in preparing to one day, God willing, be
consecrated to God as an Apostle of the Interior Life!
Staying true to my original format,
I hope to give you some information on how life is going for me with a few
sections: important events, story-time, where is my heart, and prayer
intentions. No promises to be brief! Besides, you only get a couple of these a
year – that gives you about 6 months to read each of them! J
Important Events
·
May 13 à
The Sisters and I said our goodbyes to St. Mary’s and traveled to Kansas
·
May 30-June 21 à
My time at home before moving to Rome!
·
June 21 à
Flight from Houston to New York
·
June 22 à
Flight from New York to Rome
·
June 23 à
I arrive at the place I’ll be calling home for at least the next 5 years!
·
June 27(ish) – Aug 5 à Time in the mountains with
the whole community (please pray for a Come and See and a week of Spirituality
for Priests that we will be doing during that time!)
·
June 29 à
my pastor for 5 years, Fr. David Konderla, becomes Bishop of Tulsa, OK (pray for
him)
·
Aug 20 à
our brother Joel takes his vows in Kansas City, Kansas. He is in the seminary
with hopes to be ordained a priest in the coming years.
·
Oct ?? à
I officially begin my studies at the Pontifical University of St. John in
Lateran (2 years of Philosophy and 3 years of Theology)
Story-Time
Here is
a little excerpt from a fun trip with my Sisters from the Texas House. The
background information you need to know is that our pastor Fr. David Konderla
was announced as the next Bishop of the Diocese of Tulsa, OK on the same day
that we were journeying from Texas to Kansas THROUGH Oklahoma…I wrote this on
May 13, 2016…
“…Tulsa’s
skyline is on the horizon. After making a straight shot through Fr. David’s
soon-to-be diocese, we have finally come to its first (and perhaps only) big
city. Emotions begin to rise even more as we strain to get a possible look at
the steeple that “Bishop Konderla” will call home and take a wrong exit.
Waiting impatiently at a stoplight that we should have avoided, we recommit to
our rather bazaar plan. The decision has been made. There is no going back now.
Arriving at the airport at 3:32 we
quickly navigate to the departures section of the airline our investigation has
led us to believe Fr. David is using, watching each car and every person
closely in case we manage to spot him. Everyone is on high alert and Renee Anne
takes her crucial place in the driver’s seat of our parked van making
everything that will follow after possible.
Entering into the phase of my
deepest doubt and most dreamlike hope, I follow Elena and Cele into the
thankfully small airport. Splitting up, I go take a long hard scan at the
security line (that was basically non-existent) while the other two engage in
conversation with the lady at the check-in desk. Feeling defeated I return to
my Sisters with nothing. They, too, after explaining about the newly elected
Bishop…who was a friend…yes, bishop of the catholic church…we didn’t get to say
goodbye…and so on, were, not surprisingly, told that no information could be
given about those who checked into the flight. However, the lady did mention
that one can see the gates from outside of security.
Elena and I return upstairs as Cele
takes her post at the entrance ready to intercept an unsuspecting bishop elect
in his attempt to return home. Taking a long hallway towards a small sign
indicating “waiting area,” I find myself yet again immersed in doubt. I mean,
what are the odds? In contrast, Elena’s confidence inspires me to still put
forth effort in this endeavor to salute our dear beloved pastor another time.
Arriving at the point the lady at
the check-in must have been indicating, we realize that there is not much of
the gates to see, and I think to myself: what if I just saw him? As I shrug off
the thought of this “movie scene-like” moment, I catch a glimpse of a man in
all black with short silver hair slipping behind a large column. I can’t
mistake the stature and dress of the man I’ve called spiritual father for the
last 5 years. I am convinced it is him as I struggle to get the words out to
Elena. In the excitement neither of us can seem to get ourselves under control
enough to take the next best action. Elena moves forward into the “no pass
zone” with me right behind her. All of a sudden we hear an automated voice
command us “Stop!” followed by an alarm and flashing red lights. Attention is
now on us and rightfully so.
“Where are you going?” asks the
security guard to Elena as I continue to point out Fr. David to her who is now
with his back to us innocently fishing a drink out of a vending machine. “You
see that priest at the coke machine? Can you tell him to come here? We want to
see him.” Expecting a hard “no” from the guard, we simply receive a calm “Yes I
can” and watch him walk away slowly toward our pastor. Is this really
happening? Oh my gosh, I see him. He’s actually here. “Call Cele!” I direct
Elena as she fumbles with the buttons on her phone. I see Fr. David turn as if
to respond to someone who I can’t see behind the column but hope is our nice
security guard. Slowly, calmly, and curiously - in typical Fr. David fashion -
he heads in our direction. Beginning to wave our hands, tears come to my eyes
as recognition sweeps over his face and we are greeted by his warm, somewhat
quizzical, smile. On the phone with Cele, Elena motions for me to go get her. I
wave her down and beckon her forward with a much over exaggerated arm motion.
Her response is the only rational thing to do: take off her glasses and run!
Arriving near the “do not pass”
zone, we have to basically catch her body to stop her from repeating our
episode with the alarm and flashing lights. Fr. David can’t leave and we can’t
enter but our new friend (the security guard – who is clearly on our side but
respectful of the rules of his job) holds the door open to ease our
communication. Little is said but everything understood.
With watery eyes we wave and smile
to show our love and support for a man we’ve had the privilege for many years
to call “Father.” Here he stands before us, “bishop elect”, yet the same
simple, humble, virtuous, funny, composed man we’ve always known him to be.
Father…Pastor…Friend, he stands before us his usual self, never long to linger
where lingering is not necessary. Having warned him not to heed the missed
calls and messages he can find on his phone from us, we make a final wave and
with full hearts return to the car.
Some might say that it wasn’t
enough to see each other from a distance of 15 feet. That it wasn’t worth the
emotional investment or taking an untraversed route. Others might want to
congratulate our successful attempt at “stalking” and Sherlock Holmes-like
investigation. But we have a different tendency in our community: that of
relying on Divine Providence. There is no doubt in our minds that God
orchestrated this meeting today down to the last detail. Every stop, delay,
road construction, wrong turn. All the skills and individual characteristics of
today’s travelers. Fr. David’s thirst and decision to buy a water from that
vending machine at that exact moment…Surely our collaboration was encouraged, but
it was God who played the true protagonist in today’s story…
…Let us unite in prayer for our
beloved pastor and dear friend Bishop Elect David Konderla as he prepares both
spiritually and humanly to answer this call quite literally in taking up his
place as Shepherd of the flock of Tulsa, Oklahoma.”
Where is my heart
Where
is my heart?...Where is NOT my heart? I’m about to move to Rome! That means
leaving all I’ve ever known, packing up the little I’ve chosen to keep, and
planting roots in a place I’ve only ever visited! I have all kinds of emotions
running through my head and heart in these weeks: excitement, fear, nerves,
joy, hesitation, eagerness, sadness, exhaustion, overwhelmed-ness…peace. Peace.
The most consistent feeling I have amongst those which are rapidly changing is
peace. A deep-seeded peace as if a cushion for my heart to rest on, rocking it
back and forth assuring me with confidence.
Moving
to Rome to be in formation with a religious community is certainly a “no” to
many things (regularly seeing family and friends, living in my own culture,
speaking my own language, pursuing a human love of a romantic nature…). But
what many don’t talk about in the arena of a religious vocation is what one
says “yes” to. It is the “yes’s” – Christ’s promise of “the hundredfold” – that
bring peace to my heart. Moving to Rome is not a decision made purely on my own
whim. Jesus has invited me to follow Him there, and I’ve learned that God will
not ask us to go to Africa if He doesn’t first place Africa in our hearts. In moving to Rome I get to take another step
towards the call I’ve felt in my heart pretty strongly for 3 years now – the
call to give myself completely to Him by consecrating myself to him and living
according to the life of an Apostle of the Interior Life. Only in going to
Rome, beginning to study, and living the daily, ordinary life will I be able to
continue my discernment and truly come to recognize God’s plan for me.
Following Christ is exciting! It’s an adventure full of what some might call
“unknowns” but what I’d rather look at as “opportunities to trust.” Even amidst
the struggles and challenges – the things that stretch us – there is so much
joy and love! I personally experienced this reality this past year living out
life in community, intense daily prayer, active apostolate, and continual
study. Jesus has led me this far, I have no reason to lose hope in His
continued guiding presence.
Many
have asked me what I most look forward to about being in Rome. There’s a lot to
be said as an answer but something really dear to my heart is living in the
ordinary. I can’t wait until waking up, praying, going to school, having meals,
doing chores, experiencing joys and difficulties…all in Italian and all in Rome
is just normal for me. This is not a desire for Rome to lose its charm of being
the “Eternal City” full of ancient wonders and marvels of the Church. I’m not
sure if that is even possible, especially for a history and Church lover like
me. What it is though is a desire to live life side by side with the Lord
peaceful and content with wherever I am because I am with Him. There is a
simplicity that comes with just being His, and in this simplicity lie my
deepest desires.
Prayer Intentions
I would obviously appreciate
many prayers for me and my family in this time of transition as we all adjust to
life separated by the ocean - may we all have the grace we need for the present
moment. I’d also like to ask prayers for my brother and his fiancé Jen as they
prepare to be married in March. Finally, I ask for prayers for my overall
journey and for the journey of the community – that we may follow the
promptings of the Holy Spirit in the guidance of Jesus our Good Shepherd into
the arms of our Good Father.
With much love,
Cherise
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| My beautiful family :) |
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| Brandon and his fiancé Jen |
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| The Sisters and me from the Texas House 2015-2016 |
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