Listen to (and with) your heart

This post finally comes after I started it and left it for around a month. I'm not sure how well it flows and if it is completely clear but I post it now trusting that the Lord, if He so desires, can bear fruit even from an instrument as inexperienced and weak as me. My favorite part is the end. If you take away anything, please take away our need to pray more often to Our God Who is Trustworthy. Even with this title we remind ourselves to pray for a greater trust in Him who loves us and is forever Good.


Generally speaking, there are two things that come to mind in today's world when one hears "listen to your heart."

1. Romantic ideal - involving rejection of all thoughtful analysis and the following of the whims of emotion (think: Hallmark movie)
2. Naïve notion - a nice concept but perceived as something done by one who wasn't disciplined enough to think it through first

Thus, the idea has a bit of a negative or unrealistic connotation and seems to be (at least for me) something to be weary of.

But is this so in the spiritual life? What does "listen to your heart" connote in the context of the Interior? In other words, what does it mean for an intimate friend of God to listen to his/her heart?

I bring this up because it is something that I struggle with often myself. One of the biggest temptations for me in my prayer life is making it a head game. Trying to "figure things out" or "be good" at prayer. I forget often that prayer is a relationship and that relationships involve the contribution of not only the head but also the heart.

I don't know if it is the culture or just me but when this was brought to my attention, I realized that I am not always very trusting of my heart. Or at least I am not trusting of my interpretation or reading of the movements of my heart. Questions I often asked were "Is it okay to recognize peace in my  heart even if my head is not totally convinced?" or "Is it enough to follow a conviction in my heart that I can't even explain?"

Our world has coached us to be practical, think everything through, have a long term plan, know the step that comes after the next step. In other words, our world tells us to get in and stay in our head. But who else is in our head? Are we not often times alone there?

And if prayer is a relationship with One other than ourselves then I can't only stay in my head by myself. So where must I go? Here's where we implore the aid of those intimate friends of God: the saints.

When talking about intimate friends of God, my mind immediately jumps to Our Blessed Mother Mary. Can their be a greater intimacy with the Divine than physically carrying the Son of God (who is God Himself) in the womb and witnessing both His blessed first breath and trembling last?

And, what does this intimate friend of God teach us about the interaction with and reliability of our heart? For this, we turn to the Gospel of Luke.

"But Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart." - Luke 2:19

This action of Mary - "pondering in her heart" - comes after the shepherds make known to the Holy Family the message of the Angels: "behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For today in the city of David a savior has been born for you who is Messiah and Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger." (Lk 2:10-12) 

This would clearly be overwhelming even to someone who had already been de-briefed by her own personal angel (see The Annunciation Lk 1:26-38). However Mary does not immediately jump to analyze the situation considering who else has all heard the news and which societal class will show up next to give due praise to her Son. No, she simply accepts the message and turns to the known dwelling place of the Lord God aside from her arms: her heart.

Now how do we know that we can trust our heart? That our Lord God is truly dwelling there in a way that enables us to confidently follow it.

For me this can be checked with three simple questions:

1. Am I frequenting the Sacraments?
2. Do I have a consistent and daily prayer life?
3. Do I have a wise and competent spiritual guide (i.e. spiritual director)?

These questions and their answers may take different forms for different people but their main components should be there. In other words, Sunday mass attendance is a must. If it is possible to go during the week, that should be done as well. Also, those who regularly go to confession develop greater self knowledge and understanding of their need for God's mercy (i.e. humility). I recommend at least once a month. We also must pray every day. We cannot have a relationship without communication. If you aren't yet praying, start with 10 minute reflections over the day's gospel (find those readings and a reflection here). A good goal would be to build up to a half hour a day. And finally, if available to you, find a spiritual director or mentor. Someone who can walk with you on your faith journey.

If these three components are in your life or at least the first two, you can be more relaxed about the trustworthiness of your heart.

The fact is God has a will for us and He desires that we find it. It is not some great cryptic message to decode. God knows us so well that He reveals His will to us sometimes in ways that only we can notice so don't look to far outside of yourself.

And don't worry so much about whether or not you can trust your heart. Keep your heart close to Jesus by frequenting the sacraments, praying daily, and - if possible - walking with a spiritual director or mentor and remember that He is trustworthy.

Thus listening to your heart is no longer about your heart so much as it is about your relationship with Jesus. The questions we should be asking are not about our heart's trustworthiness.
The questions are:
Am I close to Jesus? Do I have a relationship with Him?
Do I trust Jesus? Will I follow Him even with only the instructions for the next step?
 

May the God of peace himself make you perfectly holy and may you entirely, spirit, soul, and body, be preserved blameless for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will also accomplish it.  -1 Thes 5: 23-24