December 24, 2016
Dear Family, Friends, Benefactors, and Loved ones,
Today is Christmas Eve here in
Rome! My first “Christmas in the city”, and I wouldn’t be honest not to admit
that it is both beautiful and very difficult. Beautiful because I’m getting to
spend it with my community – my crazy new family that has accepted me as one of
their own. Beautiful also because I get to experience Christmas in a new
culture, that of a city and that of Italy. Very difficult because for the first
time, I’m not with my family who is the main reason that I am who I am today.
And very difficult because the exciting newness of the city life also reminds of
how much I miss the peace and quiet of Christmas morning in the country waking
up to the sun pouring in through the blinds and racing to the warmth of the
cozy fireplace prompted by the curiosity to see what’s inside the mountain of
colorful boxes under the Christmas tree.
Today and tomorrow are sure to be
filled with much hearty laughter as is always the case when the community is
all together. It will also have its moments of tears from a heart both sad and
overjoyed at the knowledge of being loved so far beyond its capacity to
reciprocate and nostalgic for that life when there will be no end to the time
shared with its loved ones.
Important Events
Please pray for my exams (almost all oral…and in Italian!)!!!!!:
·
25 January à
Introduction to Philosophy
·
31 January à
Philosophical Anthropology (my favorite!)
·
3 February à
Logic I (written)
·
6 February à
Methodology
·
8 February à
History of Ancient Philosophy
Other Important Events
·
15-19 February à
House of Formation Spiritual Exercises
·
25 March à
My brother Brandon gets married to Jen!!! (and I’ll be there!)
·
29 March à
Father Salvatore Scorza’s 65th anniversary of priesthood (our 90 yr
old founder)
·
5 August à
Francesca takes her vows in her home in Calabria!!
·
December à
Kalin takes her vows (date to be determined)
Story Time
Many of
you might not know that here in Italy it is more common to have a stick shift than
an automatic. In fact, we only have cars that are stick shifts. What does this
mean? That I had to learn to drive a standard…in Rome. It goes without saying
that my first month of lessons (taught by my formator Janel) were filled with
much anxiety and heart dropping moments in the driver’s seat. I felt completely
without control and like I was having to start over from ground zero. But it
proved to be a very beautiful experience: one of choosing against my anxiety and
nerves to trust in Janel and myself and go back out there each time accepting
all embarrassing moments and mistakes that led to many “deaths” of the car.
What I’d
like to recount to you though is a major victory that Briana (my roommate and
another girl in formation with me) had one Monday afternoon. Feeling by this
point more confident in my driving skills, I still wasn’t fighting any one for
the keys. However, that afternoon, after our weekly apostolate of doing
evangelization on one of the biggest university campuses in Rome, only Briana
and I were left going home in the car. We both looked at each other with little
nervous half smiles but determination and also excitement at the opportunity before
us of another one of our many adventures together. Having driven more at that
point, I took the keys and chose to rely fully in Briana’s memory to get us
home. We don’t have smart phones anymore and we didn’t bring the navigator with
us so Briana was literally navigating us through the streets of Rome always
succeeding in telling me to turn just as we reached the next street! You have
no idea of the joy it was to see the church and piazza near our house that
confirmed we were officially not lost!
We were
so excited and content with ourselves that upon our arrival home, after returning
the keys to the other apartment, I begin climbing the stairs to our apartment
(the 3rd floor). Turning the corner I am stopped in my tracks not
recognizing the door as ours until I realize that I climbed too many stairs and
had arrived on the 4th floor!
I wouldn’t
say that I’m an expert at driving a stick shift and the idea of having to stop
and start on a hill gives me butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it,
but I have definitely overcome my initial fears and anxiety. I can even
appreciate driving a standard as fun and at times a sort of endearing
challenge. Just a little example of what little joys (among the many big ones)
this life is offering me!
Where is my heart?
Where
to start? Just six short months ago I was on a plane traveling to Rome with a
checked bag containing those of my belongings that “made the cut” in my move (I
arrived on June 23). In this relatively brief time yet one extremely rich with
experiences, I have had my ups and downs. I’ve been through periods of prayer
involving more ease and those involving more struggle. I’ve hit many walls I
thought would be the last just before overcoming another challenge or obstacle
in the journey. I’ve continually learned of my limits and also of my ability to
do so much more than I’d ever imagine. I’ve been reminded again and again of the
value and necessity in surrendering because self-reliance never achieves
lasting victories. I’ve found myself face to face with the beautiful yet demanding
reality of being a part of a family (my community) made up of women from all
different walks of life and varying opinions and personalities from night to
day. I’ve been discouraged and encouraged just to be discouraged all over
again. I’ve done many happy dances from having received a letter or having had
a skype appointment with a dear friend to correctly using Italian grammar in an
everyday sentence. I’ve fought and won the battle against the irritatingly slow
and complicated Italian bureaucracy to officially become a resident of the city
of Rome. I’ve ventured out alone in the city to take the “mezzi” (public transportation)
and arrive on time to my appointments. I’ve met many new and beautiful people
enriching my life with each new smile!...
And
amidst all this, the craziness of this fast paced rhythm of life – one that
could leave me forgetting to breathe if it wasn’t vitally necessary – I find
that in my heart…in its core, beneath the wear and tear of everyday life…there
is but a pulsing presence of great joy and peace.
A
scripture passage that has been following me these months is Psalm 36/37. One
verse in particular caught my eye: “Abita la terra” (dwell the land). When my
eyes first came across this verse, I felt immediately drawn to it. It is as if
the Lord, through these words, is constantly inviting me to be completely
present to my realty. He has chosen to place me in these situations, with these
people, these difficulties, and these joys. This is the “stuff” it takes for me
to be purified and become holy. So instead of allowing myself to “leave” this
reality through my thoughts or distractions, He is continually calling me to be
present to it even and perhaps especially when it is hard. With my gaze on
Christ, I am reminded of the future glory (already won) that I am walking
towards and I have the courage to accept, own, and truly live the reality that
is mine. I see it as a gift, a work of mercy really. In His great mercy, God
has given me this reality to lead me back to Him. All I have to do is trust in
Him and dwell in it.
“The journey is not long for the person who loves who he/she is going
to find.” – African Proverb
Prayer Intentions
With
that all said, I ask for your continued prayers. They are certainly that which
sustains me in the everyday, ordinariness of life. In particular I ask prayers
for the grace to truly live this call of the Lord to be present to my reality.
In the midst of anxiety (with these upcoming oral exams for example) I find
myself very tempted to leave reality though my imagination or even complaints
and wishes that I didn’t have to study or that I knew more of the material
already. I ask for special prayers for Francesca and Kalin who will be taking their
vows this coming year (Francesca in August and Kalin in December). For their
preparation to give their whole selves in consecration to our Lord. I ask also
that you pray for the people that we encounter in our mission: that they may
find their peace and joy in our God who loves them beyond that which they are
able to comprehend. That they may be swept up in this unending love and lead to
the eternal joy of His Kingdom. And finally I ask prayers for my own personal
journey: that I may remain always with an open heart to receive the whispers of
God revealing His will for me.
With much love and
united in prayer,
Cherise J
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| Our Community in Rome |
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| Our founder Fr. Salvatore Scorza the day before his 90th birthday! |
